Allow me to interrupt my irregular, increasingly retroactive series of writings on my travels to bring things back to present for the time being. I still have literally thousands of photos to go through, and much more to write about both life in Rome and many more amazing excursions outside of Rome as well. The last three months were a fun, yet relentless whirlwind of traveling, hosting friends and family, planning our return to Portland, and trying to squeeze some actual, “normal” living in between. Writing and photo editing took a necessary back seat, but I’m committed to finishing documenting our experiences so we can look back at the little things that made it all so special.
For now though, I’d like to talk about where we’re at now. As I compose this, our great adventure is over for now. After one last, long journey that took us through London, a week at sea on an ocean liner, and a short detour in Brooklyn, we touched down in Portland in the wee hours of the morning and slept in the comforts of our home for the first time since early January.
It was a strange feeling coming home, exciting and terrifying, familiar and uncertain. Living abroad, while not without its challenges, was been a literal dream come true. We had fantasized about living in Italy for years, long considering it an impossibility, but never thinking long and hard about whether or not it truly was. We only needed the right motivation to work to make it a reality, so when that motivation came along, well, we did.
I still have much love in my heart for Portland, but viewing America through a looking glass across the pond only intensified my feelings of being alienated by my homeland. There’s still much to process internally about it all, but for now, our focus is on getting resettled, preparing Emi to begin kindergarten next week, and figuring out next steps.
Part of this post is to ease myself back into life in the States. I truly did not feel ready to leave Rome when the time had come. We’ll need to go back there in the winter to tie up some loose ends, so that helped me to let go in the meantime. Still, it was hard to say goodbye to the short, yet rich life we had built for ourselves. So for now I aim to bid farewell, for now at least, to a few of my favorite things about Rome, and then focus on the things, big and small, that I’ve missed about our Portland home in hopes that it helps me feel more excited about the present.
What I’ll Miss the Most
The food: What do you even say about Italian food that hasn’t been said before? It’s so damn good. The pizza, the pasta, the gelato, the cheeses, the pastries; I need to dedicate a full post to Italian eats, so I’ll keep this brief, but there’s so much depth to the Roman and Italian culinary scenes that you can only scratch the surface without an extended stay. My stomach is forever grateful.
The people: I have much love for the people of Rome. It took me a long time to figure out how to describe them. Sometimes they’re as warm and kind as they come. Other times, they’re shouting and furiously gesturing at one another like they’re conducting some wild sort of dueling, invisible symphonies because some cabbie broke one of the unspoken rules of Roman taxi queues. What I came to realize is that in a nutshell, they’re just passionate. What they believe in, they believe in fiercely, whether it’s love, politics, or pasta. Our friends and neighbors in Rome were so hospitable to us, and I miss them already.
The lifestyle: Having originated from a country that’s obsessed with work and maximizing profits, Rome was a breath of fresh air. Portland’s not so bad compared to some parts of America, but it’s still very noticeable in contrast to Rome. There’s just so much more focus on living and enjoying their lives. It’s not perfect; the economy has suffered for a long time, and there’s probably a happy middle ground to be found somewhere. There’s no apples-to-apples comparison when it comes to two very different cultures, but I definitely don’t believe the “time is money” attitude that is so pervasive in American culture is healthy or conducive to a high quality of life. We can do better.
The city: There’s something magical about living in Rome. If you can see past the hordes of tourists, the dirt, the chaos, you see this incredible city that has endured. I imagine in time the novelty might wear off, but I got a genuine rush of excitement almost every single day walking the streets and passing ruins older than this entire country, and works of art brought to life by some of the true masters of their craft. There was always something incredible to discover.
What I’m Looking Forward To
Now for the other side of things. Don’t perceive these to be whining about our situation; I know how absurdly fortunate we are to have been able to do this. I simply need to latch onto something to ease this transition and try to get myself more jazzed up about being home.
Cooking: Many of these first few are really more about apartment life in a big city than they are about Rome or Italy. We have a fantastic kitchen in Portland. By Roman standards, our apartment kitchen wasn’t bad at all, but it’s definitely much more challenging to cook for a family in tight quarters. Also, we operated mostly with the basics as far as utensils, cooking implements, and ingredients went. We could’ve invested in more, but with how long we were there, and how much we were traveling, it wouldn’t have been a great investment. I’m looking forward to our old kitchen to try to recreate some of the amazing things we’ve devoured these past seven months.
Bathroom: Like the kitchen, our Roman bathroom situation was totally solid for Roman standards, but I’m very happy to have my own sink again, and a shower I can stretch out in without accidentally punching the wall.
Laundry: While I’ve missed the speed and convenience of a clothes dryer, I may be even more happy to be done with the crusty aftermath of air-drying clothes washed in hard water. I don’t enjoy towels that exfoliate as they dry you. Ouch.
Living on the ground level: I haven’t lived higher than the second floor of anything since dorm life fifteen years ago. Living on the fifth floor (they call it the fourth floor in Italy, but let’s call a spade a spade) of our Roman apartment complex was not so bad most of the time. That said, having to summon and ride down a rickety, old wooden elevator every time you think your beagle might have to christen the floor gets trying at times — especially when said beagle turns out to have just wanted to bark at things on the street. Where it really sucked was when newbies in the Airbnb upstairs forgot to shut the elevator doors, rendering it useless, or worse, the handful of times the elevator was out of service. Six round trips up and down five flights of stairs in the Roman summer in one day is a killer; I can attest to that.
A fenced yard: Another beagle-related item. I will never again take for granted the simple pleasure of being able to open a door and send Pancake off on her merry way when it’s cold and rainy or hot and humid out.
Friends & family: Kind of an obvious one. We’ve met some wonderful people in our travels, but it’ll be nice to be amongst family and old friends once again.
Non-Italian food: Italian food is unparalleled, and this has been the happiest seven food months of my life, hands down. Sometimes though, I just want a damn pancake.
Postal service: I know USPS gets flak and is hardly a well-oiled machine, but spend a few months in Italy, and you will know much worse it can be. I have watched the seasons turn waiting in line at the Poste Italiane, and the line is just the beginning of the horrors.
Heat: It gets far worse than Rome’s heat and humidity, but I’ll still take Portland summers over Rome’s.
Tourists: I mean, I get it. Rome’s awesome, and people want to visit. Doesn’t mean I can’t feel all, “Get off my lawn!” toward them. You hear enough stories about people carving their names into the Colosseum or stealing mosaic tiles from Pompeii and you get a bit cynical. And come summertime, there’s just so damn many of them. I’m gonna make a top-notch grumpy, old man someday.
Clean, well-maintained streets: Rome’s unapologetically imperfect, and by and large, I find that an endearing quality. Where it’s not so endearing is its streets and sidewalks. Potholes are a major problem all throughout the city (yes, I know we have some in Portland too, but not like this). Worse, the garbage situation on the streets is pretty horrid, especially in the summer when tourist season was peaking and the smell was amplified by the heat. Neither of those is my biggest beef, though. Those are both symptoms of a long history of city-level corruption and mismanagement. What I really find most appalling is all the dog poop. Seriously Rome, pick up after your damn dogs. I love that Rome is super dog-friendly and that Pancake was warmly welcomed into almost any establishment, with a few sensible exceptions. But, that doesn’t mean everyday life on the streets of Rome should be like navigating a minefield. It’s a small miracle I only detonated one of those mines in seven months there. Gross.
Hockey: I got along alright without it, but I do miss my hockey, both playing and watching. It’ll be good to get back on the rink again in the coming months.
English: My Italian’s come a long way from the smattering of Duolingo lessons I put myself through before we began our time in Rome, and I could probably pass off as looking like I know what I’m doing to your average American tourist. That said, I didn’t learn nearly as much as I’d have liked to, and it led to some stressful moments. It’s nice to not have to worry about it.
Cars: I’ve honestly loved not needing to rely on a car for the vast majority our time in Europe, but there were also days where not having one complicated plans considerably.
Structure: I know I praised the Roman way of life in this same post, but that way of life also leads to a lot of chaos. There is a reliability to American living that I have missed at times.
Target: No, seriously. There is no such thing as a one-stop shop in central Rome. I can’t wait to get some new toothpaste, cheap clothes for Emilia, and some cereal bars all in one location. It’s going to be glorious.
For better or worse, we’re back. Going to continue to chip away at my backlog of entries in the coming weeks, but for now, it’s time to get some more sleep.
